So I was hanging out on the internets the other day selling watches. (I know a guy. He'll hook you up) and I came across this:
American Travelers Are the Worst in the World
http://www.marketwatch.com/story/american-travelers-are-the-worst-behaved-in-the-world-2015-06-14
I know I can't hyperlink yet. I'm a luddite. I'm working on it. Focus people. Focus!
According to this article here are the traveling sins that Americans excel at:
1. Skipping out on a bill
2. Taking extra hotel toiletries home
3. Peeing in the pool or ocean
4. Calling in sick to work to extend vacation
American Travelers Are the Worst in the World
http://www.marketwatch.com/story/american-travelers-are-the-worst-behaved-in-the-world-2015-06-14
I know I can't hyperlink yet. I'm a luddite. I'm working on it. Focus people. Focus!
According to this article here are the traveling sins that Americans excel at:
1. Skipping out on a bill
2. Taking extra hotel toiletries home
3. Peeing in the pool or ocean
4. Calling in sick to work to extend vacation
5. Planning a vacation during work
6. Sneaking goodies through customs
Here are the traveling sins that Germans excel at:
7. Cheating on your partner
It really makes you wonder. For instance I have NEVER and I mean NEVER seen anyone, American or not, SKIP out on a bill. Walk out sure. Sneak out yep. Run like hell until you are out, absolutely. Skip out though? No. I have never seen that. I would like to see that. I may have to try it myself for research purposes.
"Sir, please! Sir! You forgot to pay your bill!"
"Shut up sparky! I'm trying to skip! And no tip for you!"
As for the rest of these traveling sins I did not even realize some of them were sins. I mean hotel toiletries are little. They are adorable. They are practically screaming at you to adopt them into your private home spa. If hotels don't want me to take them then they should chain them down. With gold chains. That way I can use the adorable little clippers to snip the adorable little gold chains taking those to my adorable little home leaving the adorable little toiletries. Everybody wins. It's an adorable little idea.
Peeing in the pool or ocean is a circumstance dependent thing I believe. I get the pool. That makes sense, but the ocean? I don't know about you but if I am in the ocean and I see a shark I'm going to pee my pants. Guilty. I peed in the ocean and that shark swam away. I don't think I need to point out that the shark pees in the ocean. In fact everything pees in the ocean. Peeing is one of those things that the ocean suffers on a daily basis. If it didn't want to be peed on then it shouldn't have spawned life. I learned this wisdom after my first child.
The rest of these things are barely even worth mentioning. Planning a vacation at work? Calling in sick to extend a vacation? Sneaking goodies through customs? Who doesn't do that? It's like High School. I'm sorry if the rest of the world didn't learn to cut class and smuggle gum into school like American kids did. Well ok the past generations. Now it's cut other students and smuggle drugs, but hey it's all Hard Core now, or Common Core- whatever they're calling it today. Call your Senator.
The point is Americans were bested on one category: cheating on your spouse. The Germans won that. Americans are so bad at cheating on their spouse as a travel related sin that I, as an American, was not even aware that it was a travel related no-no. Lufthansa. I had no idea. You cheeky Germans! I don't know what they say in Germany but I do know coffee, tea, oder mich does NOT rhyme. Und dis ist how vee say gutbye in Germany Dr. Jones! *smack* Yeah. That's probably about right.
6. Sneaking goodies through customs
Here are the traveling sins that Germans excel at:
7. Cheating on your partner
It really makes you wonder. For instance I have NEVER and I mean NEVER seen anyone, American or not, SKIP out on a bill. Walk out sure. Sneak out yep. Run like hell until you are out, absolutely. Skip out though? No. I have never seen that. I would like to see that. I may have to try it myself for research purposes.
"Sir, please! Sir! You forgot to pay your bill!"
"Shut up sparky! I'm trying to skip! And no tip for you!"
As for the rest of these traveling sins I did not even realize some of them were sins. I mean hotel toiletries are little. They are adorable. They are practically screaming at you to adopt them into your private home spa. If hotels don't want me to take them then they should chain them down. With gold chains. That way I can use the adorable little clippers to snip the adorable little gold chains taking those to my adorable little home leaving the adorable little toiletries. Everybody wins. It's an adorable little idea.
Peeing in the pool or ocean is a circumstance dependent thing I believe. I get the pool. That makes sense, but the ocean? I don't know about you but if I am in the ocean and I see a shark I'm going to pee my pants. Guilty. I peed in the ocean and that shark swam away. I don't think I need to point out that the shark pees in the ocean. In fact everything pees in the ocean. Peeing is one of those things that the ocean suffers on a daily basis. If it didn't want to be peed on then it shouldn't have spawned life. I learned this wisdom after my first child.
The rest of these things are barely even worth mentioning. Planning a vacation at work? Calling in sick to extend a vacation? Sneaking goodies through customs? Who doesn't do that? It's like High School. I'm sorry if the rest of the world didn't learn to cut class and smuggle gum into school like American kids did. Well ok the past generations. Now it's cut other students and smuggle drugs, but hey it's all Hard Core now, or Common Core- whatever they're calling it today. Call your Senator.
The point is Americans were bested on one category: cheating on your spouse. The Germans won that. Americans are so bad at cheating on their spouse as a travel related sin that I, as an American, was not even aware that it was a travel related no-no. Lufthansa. I had no idea. You cheeky Germans! I don't know what they say in Germany but I do know coffee, tea, oder mich does NOT rhyme. Und dis ist how vee say gutbye in Germany Dr. Jones! *smack* Yeah. That's probably about right.
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