Cosplay Just Got Real

Sometimes I need to be reminded of things. Things like I left the water on, or its time to take my meds. The older I get the more I need reminders, so I am happy that there are articles like this one reminding me that vampires are people too:

http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/wp/2015/07/09/researchers-vampires-are-people-too-and-deserve-acceptance-by-medical-professionals/


Not only are vampires people too but they are in need of as much psychotherapy as the rest of us, which one might not realize about people that actually think they are vampires, but it's true! Because living exclusively at night and flying around as a bat drives one well, batty.


Look I get the tongue in cheek tone of the article. What alarms me, however, is the ever so slight indication permeating the piece that suggests these people CAN change reality and should be recognized as exactly what their imaginations are pretending to be. Otherkins. Furries. Handicapped. Men. Women. Sponge Bob. Captain America. You name it you can put on a costume and not only pretend to be it, but demand that everyone else pretend as well. If you pretend well enough you begin to get things like REAL rights, to the extent that people that don't want to play your pretend game can get in trouble for their rudeness. Regardless of your chromosomes or your lack of gills.


I don't think there has ever been a shortage of people that disliked reality. It can be harsh. It can be deadly. It can be just plain awful. It used to be miserable folks simply shuffled into a church, took drugs, or got sloshed to escape their situation for awhile. If they could they attempted to make their reality better. In actuality. Using the skills and abilities they had at hand. We have come a long way from that, however. Now you can simply cosplay away from your actual reality until your pretend reality becomes your new reality. No religion, mind altering substances or assembly required. Society has decided to stop relegating you to the psych ward and accommodate you. Which is good because I was getting really upset with my situation. I have some changes to my reality that need to go into effect.

First off I am no longer diabetic. I expect my doctor's bills and insurance rates to reflect this change. Second I am no longer agoraphobic. I can walk around willy nilly now without becoming overwhelmed. So let it be written. So let it be done.

Other than that

I hereby choose to identify as a disabled mixed ethnicity Native American/African American Islamic female veteran that was raised by aliens and given special powers of righteous grooviness. My disco moves solve world hunger. I have an intelligent lemur as a sidekick.
I will be applying to Ivy League Schools and expect to get full ride scholarships to all of them. When I graduate I expect to get any job I apply for in the private or public sector. If I do not I will be suing for discrimination and harrasement.

I also expect adequate media coverage to talk about me me me, and I expect many awards and accolades for my courageous and brave distortions of reality. My own Marvel movie trilogy would be a nice touch but is not absolutely necessary.
I will be writing a book to explain how you may best serve me without being offensive to me or my lemur and I will need to run for and win a public office which I will not have to work at in order to meet my financial and medical needs.
Also all you Europeans get off my Native Lands! In addition you all owe me reparations. Congress should begin work crafting legislation on a national lemur rights bill as well. Let's bring disco back too.
Don't make me identify as 7 feet tall and an NBA All Star with X ray vision! Don't think I won't!

I realize that there are many haters that might find this burdensome, costly and ridiculous but this is reality now. Deal with it. Check your privilege! Thank you.

Please remember I am just a person too you know! I need just as much psychotherapy as everyone else! If people could be less ignorant of my particular needs and reality that's all I ask! Why won't people love me??!!