NOT Einstein

Remember that kid in school that was so good at Math? His credentials were always coming up with the answer the fastest and turning in his Math test first. He always got As. I don't know about you, but in my case he wasn't alone. He had help destroying my mathematical self esteem. All his Math buddies traveled in a pack and took turns competing against each other to see who could answer the problems the fastest. Later they got into college and had competitions to see which of them could program a scientific calculator the fastest, or come up with the most efficient way to design a computer chip. That is all well and fine. I'm glad they were having fun.


Meanwhile the rest of us, me included, came to grips with the fact that since we weren't the fastest or the most efficient we weren't so good at Math. Oh sure I could solve any problem I was given, but I solved it in 600 seconds, not 6 seconds. As a result I felt average at Math. Passable. My instructors often pointed out I was in good company. You know, they would say, Einstein wasn't good at Math either. It made me feel better but they were lying. Einstein was actually VERY good at Math. I found this out later. So why didn't he do well in school? Something didn't add up (hehe).

I eventually discovered I was better at Math than I thought. My epiphany came in a college Math course. Up to that point the "smart" kids were the ones that did everything quickly and efficiently. One fine day, however, the professor put a proof on the board that supposedly showed that 2+2=5. It looked pretty good. The smart students were beside themselves. They pounded away on their calculators and loudly proclaimed it couldn't be true. The proof was staring them right in the face, however, and try as they might they couldn't figure it out. They repeatedly flew over the proof and found themselves stumped. Half an hour later none of them had figured it out. That's when I raised my hand. It had taken me 30 minutes, but I had meticulously gone over the proof and found the insidious little "error" the professor had snuck into the problem.
"You can't do that." I said.
"Do what?" he said.
I got up and pointed out the error. "This".
"Good job Arnie! You win Math class today!" he proclaimed.
I was stunned. All things being equal the fast students were stumped because they were interested in glossing over everything as quickly as possible. I figured it out because I took the time to not gloss over anything. For the first time I had the chance to shine because I had the time to shine. In the next few weeks that Math professor allowed me to beef up my Mathematical self esteem in a big way. I have always been grateful for that and I finally began to understand what the deal with Einstein was.

Do you know why we use computers? It isn't because they are smart. People endlessly point out that computers are actually stupid. They literally do ONLY what we tell them to do. However, they do it very quickly and very efficiently. That's their strong point. People on the other hand do things slowly and inefficiently. They sit around and think things up at a glacial pace. Things like computers. Imagine that.


Einstein wasn't good at doing Math quickly and efficiently either and as a result he did poorly in school and discarded things like algebra and went on to doing "thought experiments" in theoretical physics. He sat around and thought up things like Special Relativity. He had his fast, efficient friend do the algebra. I bet later at the University secure in his tenure and lauded as one of the world's most brilliant minds he could have shown his early instructors a thing or two about algebra.


The point being Speed Racer over here can spend ten minutes going over the Mach 5 thirty two times but still can't discover that Chim Chim and Spritle are hiding in the trunk. The Comcast turtles could spend an hour going over the Mach 5 once and Chim Chim and Spritle would be busted. Speed Racer is NOT Einstein. Don't ever think for a minute that just because you can't do something quickly and efficiently that you are bad at it. We need new things along the lines of computers and Special Relativity and those are not things that will be thought up quickly or efficiently- no matter how much our world celebrates and rewards speed and efficiency.


Take time to smell the roses campers, because who knows? You might crack the code on gravity or cure cancer. Or you know, diabetes. No sugar rush required.